I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
