Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
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There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
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You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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