I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
