Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Randomize
