He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink