Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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