I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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