Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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