He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm too high and old for this...
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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