I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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