I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
