it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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