I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
