"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
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can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
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I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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