I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
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Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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