You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
