I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Betty ford says i'm here all night
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
