i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
