I think scott just propositioned me for sex
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
