He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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