Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
