I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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