How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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