we have officially lost it.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
