Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
