How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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