watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
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