i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
