I'm so fucking centered right now
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Randomize
