lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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