I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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