And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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