I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
