im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
