i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
