the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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