Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
