Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
