Umm I'm too high to move.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
