i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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