Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
