Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
