so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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