This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
