a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
