So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
