when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
