there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize