I'm drive I can fine osifer
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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