Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
