I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
