Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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