Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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